Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Things my five year old has learned

Frogs come from eggs.

Caterpillars become Butterflies.

Plants grow from seeds.

Saying fuck in the school gym is a bad idea.

Calling your camp counselor "gay" is also a bad idea.

It is possible to be expelled from summer camp.

Singing the Indiana Jones theme as loudly as possible is great way to make Dad start yelling.

Sometimes it is necessary to deal with an overbearing older brother with a controlled application of violence.

"Unbreakable" plates aren't.

Dirt tastes good.

Batting your eyelids in an adorable and apologetic way sometimes gets you out of real trouble.

4 comments:

dogimo said...

The truth value of a couple of those lessons won't persist into adulthood.

Sean Scully said...

Most of them will remain solid, I would say. Perhaps the Indiana Jones item may change over time. Dad will no longer yell, he will merely take actions to have him committed.

dogimo said...

I was thinking of dirt and eyelids, albeit, for girls the latter one only gets more applicable. DEPENDING.

dogimo said...

Also, calling your counselor "gay" is one thing you shouldn't try to get out of by batting your eyelids and looking adorable. It's mixed messages.